It’s a peculiar thing to be human and not always fully know the difference between actual love versus possession, or oppression depending on which side you fall, and obsession. Concepts so vasty different and yet depending on your quality of trauma, it can really be difficult to discern the wholesome one from the toxic others. In the poetry book Church by author Bontle Moabi, we experience an illustration of obsession dressed up as love — or at least my current understanding of it.
The poetry series takes you on a journey of a person putting so much weighting and value on a romantic relationship, so much so that the magnitude of it becomes as wild as religion itself. There are strong elements of worshiping the other, in a manner one should only reserve for God. Losing oneself in another that the constant need for their approval becomes daily bread. However, the author demonstrates how one could inadvertently fall into such a fellowship — toxicity can be seductive after all, depending on what you are seeking and your level of self awareness.
I made you my church.— Church, Bontle Moabi, 2020
In you I submitted to the headship of Christ
I magnified the glory of God because of you
My sainthood was perfected in you.
As all toxic things go, the blinders gradually fall away, the truth reveals itself ever so beautifully and painfully like a complete metamorphosis, and one is awakened to His light. Moabi writes with blatant beauty to this saying;
In the midst of my pain,— Church, Bontle Moabi, 2020
I fell in love with someone that will never leave me
He is a lover that heals me, cares for me, gives me peace, comforts me, protects me, guides me
He sees me
– El Roi
For an easy read with a punch enough make you take a walk or drink an icy lemon water slowly in contemplation — Church is definitely for the win. The book is self-published, available on Amazon, or directly from the author’s website bontlemoabi.com. Enjoy!